Just a taste

Figured I'd spice things up with a little teaser pic. Same corset I'm wearing for my profile pic but taken long before... Were I to take a picture now you'd see my tattoo through the mesh.

I'm not a groupie!

I like to frequent one of the local  tattoo shops because, aside from being fascinated with the ancient practice of tattooing and it's cultural significance/tabooness, I enjoy talking to my Tattoo Artist and his Business Partner. Sometimes I bring them coffee, and I've discussed cooking them lunch some time since they are becoming increasingly dissatisfied with the quality of local take out. Anyway, last Friday I met Business Partner's Wife. She was very blunt and real; not getting along with many women, I appreciated her and started chatting her up on Facebook. Just for some back story, Tattoo Artist and Business Partner have both propositioned me, which at this point has gone no farther than some flirting and nude picture messages.

Business Partner and his Wife (heretofore they shall be known) are swingers. A consensual, non-monogamous couple. Rare these days. I was chatting with Wife last night about their relationship and about my sexuality, being The Other Woman. What she called me took me by surprised: she called me a groupie. My first response, being a child of the '80's and hair bands was "eeew!" But she defined it as a woman who goes after another woman's man. Interesting. I linked her to The Business Transaction for my side of it. Anyway, we'll see how this goes. I do want to play...

Oh, it's Earth Day kiddos. I plan on doing some digging in the dirt to get my garden started. Get off your computer and do something nice for the environment today!

I am a geek, after all

I did go searching for a documentary  on cheating and found one that seemed to be fairly well-received. It's called "Loving and Cheating" and is available for streaming on Netflix. While interesting, it was not nearly as... Sciencey as I was hoping. I was pleased to see Dan Savage as one of the experts. There was a nice representation of very strictly monogamous couples and couples in open relationships and discussion on how they've handled cheating in their relationships.

One of the questions posed was: if you cheat should you tell? My gut reaction to this is no, but then again, I was cheated on, and would probably be less resentful for not knowing. He hid it well but made the mistake of sharing his passwords with me. So, if you cheat, don't tell, and don't leave a paper trail. Or make a private email that only your lover knows about and have him or her send stuff to you there.

I'm still looking for more documentaries so if anyone knows of any that are a little more scientific, drop me a line here. For now I'm signing off for some old school Batman and snuggles with the cat.

Until next time

I'm not dead... yet

Sorry I've been absent loyal readers, I've had some health issues going on recently and just haven't had the energy or the brainmeats to post (at least nothing coherent). I've been looking for some good documentaries on sexuality and cheating, does anyone know of any?

Good reads

I've become ridiculously addicted to Dan Savage's column "Savage Love" to the point that I'm constantly refreshing the app on my phone, desperately hoping that I'll get a two-fer. Alas, no such luck. However, I have come across some great reads on sexuality lately and I'm thinking of setting up some sort of index or side bar for links. Education is the key, kiddos.

Support Systems

When I first started in on my foray of being the Other Woman, I was awkward, unsure of myself. Like any self-respecting geek, I first turned to the Internet for support. I had an image in my head of the high-class Other Woman, wearing pearls and having fabulous secret luncheons, being cherished and put upon a secret pedestal. Oh, how wrong I was. It was a nice fantasy anyway, and I much prefer diamonds. Scouring the Internet for others like me, I found forums for those who were looking for idealized relationships with the person they were the other woman (or other man) with. Holding out for the day that their lover would leave their spouse and they could ride off into the sunset, tra-la, tra-la.

This was not the type of support I was looking for. I came to the realization that really, being the Other Woman is a lonely existence. It's getting up early and driving to the next town for a booty call, secret texts, yearning and hurt. And you have no one to confide in, because what is your family going to say, other than "what the fuck are you doing?" Bragging is the first step in messing things up, because eventually it will get back to the girlfriend/wife and then you're screwed. Even more so if emotions are involved.

If anyone finds a support forum with people other than wishy-washy hopeless romantics, let me know.